Tuesday, 15 August 2017

A tad bit.. lost?

And she's back with another post! 

I'm typing this out as I ponder on all the things that I would have written over the years if I was actually bothered to jot down the things that have been running and playing in my head or at least blog about it.. I would have a lovely journal! Which I don't, ha-ha. 

It has been exactly 2 weeks since I resigned from my post of Assistant Architect. I don't really know how to feel about it. I am happy that I no longer have to wake up in the early AMs just to be stuck in an hour jam to work. Instead, I'm able to wake up in my comfy bed a little bit late until my conscience tells me to get up and start my day. Which is bad since my conscience enjoys late mornings. I am also trying to keep myself busy by doing the usual house chores and designing my parents' future house.. while browsing for accommodations to rent, skimming through books and journals on future thesis topics. I haven't got that figured out, yet. To be honest, I'm a bit lost. Lost on trying to figure out how I'll be coping the next 2 years, in a new place with new faces. Lost on the things I should be packing for and the things I should and should not be bringing. Lost on the littlest things that I shouldn't be worrying about since everything is actually well figured out already. Or maybe it is just my conscience once again that is afraid of the slight (major!) changes in life that is ahead of me.

I'm pretty sure I'll be okay. 

Friday, 28 July 2017

Not Another Try.

Hi again! 

I have decided to finally.... (insert drum rolls) try to rejuvenate my love for blogging again. I have been endlessly saying that for the past years without a fail. But you know, some mantras just don't work the way you planned it to be. Since it's obviously without any efforts... right in the face there, mate.

I was kind of triggered during an interview for a Masters programme in University of Malaya recently. The interviewer mentioned on how I talk a lot (definitely true), unsure if that was a compliment or not.. then she asked if I write too? I muted for a few seconds, knowing the last few passages I've probably written was a long ass Instagram caption or that heritage report I wrote during degree which was exactly a year ago. I confidently answered, 'I don't have any thesis or any published articles. But, I blog!' I was gobsmacked by the words that came out from my own mouth. I mean, how can you just say 'I blog' during an interview for a Masters programme.. Is that even considered as something that's acceptable in the world of academia. However, she was absolutely amused and started asking questions on my blog, what I blog about and when was the last time I blogged etc, etc. And I surprisingly got the offer!

So, that was when I was like okay.. my blog posts are actually something relevant to the real world. It was once a medium to let me 'spill' my thoughts and feelings. Hence, the title 'Her Spills' on my header. But I realised it's not only that, it was a part of my childhood and memories that I wanted to share, which I want to bring to life again. 

I guess, I'm back! 

Friday, 1 January 2016

Kickstart of a New Year.

1st of January 2016.

It's amazing how time passes by so swiftly without you noticing as it changes you and the people around you. It's also amazing how it's the beginning of a new year and starting everything off with a clean slate would be the only best thing to do. To cherish all the good things that have happened in the previous year, blindly erase and just learn from the bad ones. It's even more amazing to know that there is no such thing as the greatest year ever because every single year that you go through, you experience it differently.

This year had taught me a lot.

From traveling to other countries without any grownups (I was 21 and still overly attached with my parents) to learning how to finally manage my life. I've eventually learnt and experienced the quote that I've been chanting to myself over the years, good things will come to those who wait. Well, it's definitely true. Certain things will take ample time to happen, just how it takes time for a baby to learn how to walk and talk. All the patience that one goes through, it will be all worth it in the end. I've also learnt that certain friends come and go like tides. This is probably one of the most cliche phrases ever, but it is somehow true. I tend to question myself on how does this circle of friendship even work. Is it based on who you needed most then. Or is it just a game of spin-the-wheel. It's not really a big of a deal anyway, it is something that you get used to after a while. I am a driftwood, after all. You have to be nice to everyone. No matter how selfless one may be, just be kind. Kindness overrules all. But don't just be kind in front of them and be the opposite behind. It portrays one's sincerity. So be sincere.

I wish for a better year, although 2015 was an honestly good one. I've had more good days compared to the bad. More smiles compared to cries. I wish that this year will be a year where I'll strive in whatever I do, achieve the things I have yet to achieve. Become a better Muslimah, I have yet to be. I wish for an even greater year for everyone. InshaAllah.